[The Buddha is speaking to Saccaka Aggivessana:]
"Before my Awakening, when I was still an unawakened Bodhisatta, the
thought occurred to me: 'The household life is crowded, a
dusty road. Life gone forth is the open air. It isn't easy, living in a
home, to lead the holy life that is totally perfect, totally pure, a
polished shell. What if I, having shaved off my hair & beard and putting on
the ochre robe, were to go forth from the home life into homelessness?'
"So at a later time, when I was still young, black-haired, endowed with
the blessings of youth in the first stage of life, having shaved off my hair
& beard — though my parents wished otherwise and were grieving with tears on
their faces — I put on the ochre robe and went forth from the home life into
homelessness.
"Having gone forth in search of what might be skillful, seeking the
unexcelled state of sublime peace, I went to Alara Kalama
and, on arrival, said to him: 'Friend Kalama, I want to practice in this
doctrine & discipline.'
"When this was said, he replied to me, 'You may stay here, my friend.
This doctrine is such that a wise person can soon enter & dwell in his own
teacher's knowledge, having realized it for himself through direct
knowledge.'
"It was not long before I learned the doctrine. As far as mere
lip-reciting & repetition, I could speak the words of knowledge, the words
of the elders, and I could affirm that I knew & saw — I, along with others.
"I thought: 'It isn't through mere conviction alone that Alara Kalama
declares, "I have entered & dwell in this Dhamma, having realized it for
myself through direct knowledge." Certainly he dwells knowing & seeing this
Dhamma.' So I went to him and said, 'To what extent do you declare that you
have entered & dwell in this Dhamma?' When this was said, he declared the
dimension of nothingness.
"I thought: 'Not only does Alara Kalama have conviction, persistence,
mindfulness, concentration, & discernment. I, too, have conviction,
persistence, mindfulness, concentration, & discernment. What if I were to
endeavor to realize for myself the Dhamma that Alara Kalama declares he has
entered & dwells in, having realized it for himself through direct
knowledge.' So it was not long before I quickly entered & dwelled in that
Dhamma, having realized it for myself through direct knowledge. I went to
him and said, 'Friend Kalama, is this the extent to which you have entered &
dwell in this Dhamma, having realized it for yourself through direct
knowledge?'
"'Yes, my friend...'
"'This, friend, is the extent to which I, too, have entered & dwell in
this Dhamma, having realized it for myself through direct knowledge.'
"'It is a gain for us, my friend, a great gain for us, that we have such
a companion in the holy life. So the Dhamma I declare I have entered & dwell
in, having realized it for myself through direct knowledge, is the Dhamma
you declare you have entered & dwell in, having realized it for yourself
through direct knowledge. And the Dhamma you declare you have entered &
dwell in, having realized it for yourself through direct knowledge, is the
Dhamma I declare I have entered & dwell in, having realized it for myself
through direct knowledge. The Dhamma I know is the Dhamma you know; the
Dhamma you know is the Dhamma I know. As I am, so are you; as you are, so am
I. Come friend, let us now lead this community together.'
"In this way did Alara Kalama, my teacher, place me, his pupil, on the
same level with himself and pay me great honor. But the thought occurred to
me, 'This Dhamma leads not to disenchantment, to dispassion, to cessation,
to stilling, to direct knowledge, to Awakening, nor to Unbinding, but only
to reappearance in the dimension of nothingness.' So, dissatisfied with that
Dhamma, I left.
"In search of what might be skillful, seeking the unexcelled state of
sublime peace, I went to Uddaka Ramaputta and, on
arrival, said to him: 'Friend Uddaka, I want to practice in this doctrine &
discipline.'
"When this was said, he replied to me, 'You may stay here, my friend.
This doctrine is such that a wise person can soon enter & dwell in his own
teacher's knowledge, having realized it for himself through direct
knowledge.'
"It was not long before I quickly
learned
the doctrine. As far as mere lip-reciting & repetition, I could speak the
words of knowledge, the words of the elders, and I could affirm that I knew
& saw — I, along with others.
"I thought: 'It wasn't through mere conviction alone that Rama declared,
"I have entered & dwell in this Dhamma, having realized it for myself
through direct knowledge." Certainly he dwelled knowing & seeing this
Dhamma.' So I went to Uddaka and said, 'To what extent did Rama declare that
he had entered & dwelled in this Dhamma?' When this was said, Uddaka
declared the dimension of neither perception nor non-perception.
"I thought: 'Not only did Rama have conviction, persistence, mindfulness,
concentration, & discernment. I, too, have conviction, persistence,
mindfulness, concentration, & discernment. What if I were to endeavor to
realize for myself the Dhamma that Rama declared he entered & dwelled in,
having realized it for himself through direct knowledge.' So it was not long
before I quickly entered & dwelled in that Dhamma, having realized it for
myself through direct knowledge. I went to Uddaka and said, 'Friend Uddaka,
is this the extent to which Rama entered & dwelled in this Dhamma, having
realized it for himself through direct knowledge?'
"'Yes, my friend...'
"'This, friend, is the extent to which I, too, have entered & dwell in
this Dhamma, having realized it for myself through direct knowledge.'
"'It is a gain for us, my friend, a great gain for us, that we have such
a companion in the holy life. So the Dhamma Rama declared he entered &
dwelled in, having realized it for himself through direct knowledge, is the
Dhamma you declare you have entered & dwell in, having realized it for
yourself through direct knowledge. And the Dhamma you declare you have
entered & dwell in, having realized it for yourself through direct
knowledge, is the Dhamma Rama declared he entered & dwelled in, having
realized it for himself through direct knowledge. The Dhamma he knew is the
Dhamma you know; the Dhamma you know is the Dhamma he knew. As he was, so
are you; as you are, so was he. Come friend, lead this community.'
"In this way did Uddaka Ramaputta, my companion in the holy life, place
me in the position of teacher and pay me great honor. But the thought
occurred to me, 'This Dhamma leads not to disenchantment, to dispassion, to
cessation, to stilling, to direct knowledge, to Awakening, nor to Unbinding,
but only to reappearance in the dimension of neither perception nor
non-perception.' So, dissatisfied with that Dhamma, I left.
"In search of what might be skillful, seeking the unexcelled state of
sublime peace, I wandered by stages in the Magadhan country and came to the
military town of Uruvela. There I saw some delightful countryside, with an
inspiring forest grove, a clear-flowing river with fine, delightful banks,
and villages for alms-going on all sides. The thought occurred to me: 'How
delightful is this countryside, with its inspiring forest grove,
clear-flowing river with fine, delightful banks, and villages for alms-going
on all sides. This is just right for the striving of a clansman intent on
striving.' So I sat down right there, thinking, 'This is just right for
striving.'
"Then these three similes — spontaneous, never before heard — appeared to
me. Suppose there were a wet, sappy piece of timber lying
in the water, and a man were to come along with an upper fire-stick,
thinking, 'I'll light a fire. I'll produce heat.' Now what do you think?
Would he be able to light a fire and produce heat by rubbing the upper
fire-stick in the wet, sappy timber lying in the water?"
"No, Master Gotama. Why is that? Because the timber is wet & sappy, and
besides it is lying in the water. Eventually the man would reap only his
share of weariness & disappointment."
"So it is with any priest or contemplative who does not live withdrawn
from sensuality in body & mind, and whose desire, infatuation, urge, thirst,
& fever for sensuality is not relinquished & stilled within him: Whether or
not he feels painful, racking, piercing feelings due to his striving [for
Awakening], he is incapable of knowledge, vision, & unexcelled
self-awakening. This was the first simile — spontaneous, never before heard
— that appeared to me.
"Then a second simile — spontaneous, never before heard — appeared to me.
Suppose there were a wet, sappy piece of timber lying on land far from
water, and a man were to come along with an upper fire-stick, thinking,
'I'll light a fire. I'll produce heat.' Now what do you think? Would he be
able to light a fire and produce heat by rubbing the upper fire-stick in the
wet, sappy timber lying on land far from water?"
"No, Master Gotama. Why is that? Because the timber is wet & sappy, even
though it is lying on land far from water. Eventually the man would reap
only his share of weariness & disappointment."
"So it is with any priest or contemplative who lives withdrawn from
sensuality in body only, but whose desire, infatuation, urge, thirst, &
fever for sensuality is not relinquished & stilled within him: Whether or
not he feels painful, racking, piercing feelings due to his striving, he is
incapable of knowledge, vision, & unexcelled self-awakening. This was the
second simile — spontaneous, never before heard — that appeared to me.
"Then a third simile — spontaneous, never before heard — appeared to me.
Suppose there were a dry, sapless piece of timber lying on land far from
water, and a man were to come along with an upper fire-stick, thinking,
'I'll light a fire. I'll produce heat.' Now what do you think? Would he be
able to light a fire and produce heat by rubbing the upper fire-stick in the
dry, sapless timber lying on land?"
"Yes, Master Gotama. Why is that? Because the timber is dry & sapless,
and besides it is lying on land far from water."
"So it is with any priest or contemplative who lives withdrawn from
sensuality in body & mind, and whose desire, infatuation, urge, thirst, &
fever for sensuality is relinquished & stilled within him: Whether or not he
feels painful, racking, piercing feelings due to his striving, he is capable
of knowledge, vision, & unexcelled self-awakening. This was the third simile
— spontaneous, never before heard — that appeared to me.
"I thought: 'Suppose that I, clenching my teeth and pressing my tongue
against the roof of my mouth, were to beat down, constrain, & crush my mind
with my awareness.' So, clenching my teeth and pressing my tongue against
the roof of my mouth, I beat down, constrained, & crushed my mind with my
awareness. Just as a strong man, seizing a weaker man by the head or the
throat or the shoulders, would beat him down, constrain, & crush him, in the
same way I beat down, constrained, & crushed my mind with my awareness. As I
did so, sweat poured from my armpits. And although tireless persistence was
aroused in me, and unmuddled mindfulness established, my body was aroused &
uncalm because of the painful exertion. But the painful feeling that arose
in this way did not invade my mind or remain.
"I thought: 'Suppose I were to become absorbed in the trance of
non-breathing.' So I stopped the in-breaths & out-breaths in my nose &
mouth. As I did so, there was a loud roaring of winds coming out my earholes,
just like the loud roar of winds coming out of a smith's
bellows... So I stopped the in-breaths & out-breaths in my nose & mouth &
ears. As I did so, extreme forces sliced through my head,
just as if a strong man were slicing my head open with a sharp sword...
Extreme pains arose in my head, just as if a strong man
were tightening a turban made of tough leather straps around my head...
Extreme forces carved up my stomach cavity, just as if
a butcher or his apprentice were to carve up the stomach cavity of an ox...
There was an extreme burning in my body, just as if two strong men, grabbing
a weaker man by the arms, were to roast & broil him over a pit of hot
embers. And although tireless persistence was aroused in me, and unmuddled
mindfulness established, my body was aroused & uncalm because of the painful
exertion. But the painful feeling that arose in this way did not invade my
mind or remain.
"Devas, on seeing me, said, 'Gotama the contemplative is dead.' Other
devas said, 'He isn't dead, he's dying.' Others said, 'He's neither dead nor
dying, he's an arahant, for this is the way arahants live.'
"I thought: 'Suppose I were to practice going altogether without food.'
Then devas came to me and said, 'Dear sir, please don't practice going
altogether without food. If you go altogether without food, we'll infuse
divine nourishment in through your pores, and you will survive on that.' I
thought, 'If I were to claim to be completely fasting while these devas are
infusing divine nourishment in through my pores, I would be lying.' So I
dismissed them, saying, 'Enough.'
"I thought: 'Suppose I were to take only a little food at a time, only a
handful at a time of bean soup, lentil soup, vetch soup, or pea soup.' So I
took only a little food at a time, only handful at a time of bean soup,
lentil soup, vetch soup, or pea soup. My body became extremely emaciated.
Simply from my eating so little, my limbs became like the jointed segments
of vine stems or bamboo stems... My backside became like a camel's hoof...
My spine stood out like a string of beads... My ribs jutted out like the
jutting rafters of an old, run-down barn... The gleam of my eyes appeared to
be sunk deep in my eye sockets like the gleam of water deep in a well... My
scalp shriveled & withered like a green bitter gourd, shriveled & withered
in the heat & the wind... The skin of my belly became so stuck to my spine
that when I thought of touching my belly, I grabbed hold of my spine as
well; and when I thought of touching my spine, I grabbed hold of the skin of
my belly as well... If I urinated or defecated, I fell over on my face right
there... Simply from my eating so little, if I tried to ease my body by
rubbing my limbs with my hands, the hair — rotted at its roots — fell from
my body as I rubbed, simply from eating so little.
"People on seeing me would say, 'Gotama the contemplative is black. Other
people would say, 'Gotama the contemplative isn't black, he's brown.' Others
would say, 'Gotama the contemplative is neither black nor brown, he's
golden-skinned. So much had the clear, bright color of my skin deteriorated,
simply from eating so little.
"I thought: 'Whatever priests or contemplatives in the past have felt
painful, racking, piercing feelings due to their striving, this is the
utmost. None have been greater than this. Whatever priests or contemplatives
in the future will feel painful, racking, piercing feelings due to their
striving, this is the utmost. None will be greater than this. Whatever
priests or contemplatives in the present are feeling painful, racking,
piercing feelings due to their striving, this is the utmost. None is greater
than this. But with this racking practice of austerities I haven't attained
any superior human state, any distinction in knowledge or vision worthy of
the noble ones. Could there be another path to Awakening?'
"I thought: 'I recall once, when my father the Sakyan was working, and I
was sitting in the cool shade of a rose-apple tree, then — quite withdrawn
from sensuality, withdrawn from unskillful mental qualities — I entered &
remained in the first jhana: rapture & pleasure born from withdrawal,
accompanied by directed thought & evaluation. Could that be the path to
Awakening?' Then, following on that memory, came the realization: 'That is
the path to Awakening.' I thought: 'So why am I afraid of that pleasure that
has nothing to do with sensuality, nothing to do with unskillful mental
qualities?' I thought: 'I am no longer afraid of that pleasure that has
nothing to do with sensuality, nothing to do with unskillful mental
qualities, but it is not easy to achieve that pleasure with a body so
extremely emaciated. Suppose I were to take some solid food: some rice &
porridge.' So I took some solid food: some rice & porridge. Now five monks
had been attending on me, thinking, 'If Gotama, our contemplative, achieves
some higher state, he will tell us.' But when they saw me taking some solid
food — some rice & porridge — they were disgusted and left me, thinking, 'Gotama
the contemplative is living luxuriously. He has abandoned his exertion and
is backsliding into abundance.'
"So when I had taken solid food and regained strength, then — quite
withdrawn from sensuality, withdrawn from unskillful mental qualities, I
entered & remained in the first jhana: rapture & pleasure born from
withdrawal, accompanied by directed thought & evaluation. But the pleasant
feeling that arose in this way did not invade my mind or remain. With the
stilling of directed thought & evaluation, I entered & remained in the
second jhana: rapture & pleasure born of composure, unification of awareness
free from directed thought & evaluation — internal assurance. But the
pleasant feeling that arose in this way did not invade my mind or remain.
With the fading of rapture I remained in equanimity, mindful & alert, and
physically sensitive of pleasure. I entered & remained in the third jhana,
of which the Noble Ones declare, 'Equanimous & mindful, he has a pleasurable
abiding.' But the pleasant feeling that arose in this way did not invade my
mind or remain. With the abandoning of pleasure & pain — as with the earlier
disappearance of elation & distress — I entered & remained in the fourth
jhana: purity of equanimity & mindfulness, neither pleasure nor pain. But
the pleasant feeling that arose in this way did not invade my mind or
remain.
"When the mind was thus concentrated, purified, bright, unblemished, rid
of defilement, pliant, malleable, steady, & attained to imperturbability, I
directed it to the knowledge of recollecting my past lives. I recollected my
manifold past lives, i.e., one birth, two... five, ten... fifty, a hundred,
a thousand, a hundred thousand, many eons of cosmic contraction, many eons
of cosmic expansion, many eons of cosmic contraction & expansion: 'There I
had such a name, belonged to such a clan, had such an appearance. Such was
my food, such my experience of pleasure & pain, such the end of my life.
Passing away from that state, I re-arose there. There too I had such a name,
belonged to such a clan, had such an appearance. Such was my food, such my
experience of pleasure & pain, such the end of my life. Passing away from
that state, I re-arose here.' Thus I remembered my manifold past lives in
their modes & details.
"This was the first knowledge I attained in the first watch of the night.
Ignorance was destroyed; knowledge arose; darkness was destroyed; light
arose — as happens in one who is heedful, ardent, & resolute. But the
pleasant feeling that arose in this way did not invade my mind or remain.
"When the mind was thus concentrated, purified, bright, unblemished, rid
of defilement, pliant, malleable, steady, & attained to imperturbability, I
directed it to the knowledge of the passing away & reappearance of beings. I
saw — by means of the divine eye, purified & surpassing the human — beings
passing away & re-appearing, and I discerned how they are inferior &
superior, beautiful & ugly, fortunate & unfortunate in accordance with their
kamma: 'These beings — who were endowed with bad conduct of body, speech, &
mind, who reviled the noble ones, held wrong views and undertook actions
under the influence of wrong views — with the break-up of the body, after
death, have re-appeared in the plane of deprivation, the bad destination,
the lower realms, in hell. But these beings — who were endowed with good
conduct of body, speech & mind, who did not revile the noble ones, who held
right views and undertook actions under the influence of right views — with
the break-up of the body, after death, have re-appeared in the good
destinations, in the heavenly world.' Thus — by means of the divine eye,
purified & surpassing the human — I saw beings passing away & re-appearing,
and I discerned how they are inferior & superior, beautiful & ugly,
fortunate & unfortunate in accordance with their kamma.
"This was the second knowledge I attained in the second watch of the
night. Ignorance was destroyed; knowledge arose; darkness was destroyed;
light arose — as happens in one who is heedful, ardent, & resolute. But the
pleasant feeling that arose in this way did not invade my mind or remain.
"When the mind was thus concentrated, purified, bright, unblemished, rid
of defilement, pliant, malleable, steady, & attained to imperturbability, I
directed it to the knowledge of the ending of the mental fermentations. I
discerned, as it was actually present, that 'This is stress... This is the
origination of stress... This is the cessation of stress... This is the way
leading to the cessation of stress... These are fermentations... This is the
origination of fermentations... This is the cessation of fermentations...
This is the way leading to the cessation of fermentations.' My heart, thus
knowing, thus seeing, was released from the fermentation of sensuality,
released from the fermentation of becoming, released from the fermentation
of ignorance. With release, there was the knowledge, 'Released.' I discerned
that 'Birth is ended, the holy life fulfilled, the task done. There is
nothing further for this world.'
"This was the third knowledge I attained in the third watch of the night.
Ignorance was destroyed; knowledge arose; darkness was destroyed; light
arose — as happens in one who is heedful, ardent, & resolute. But the
pleasant feeling that arose in this way did not invade my mind or remain."